Why did Trump visit the zoo? To teach the lions how to roar like him.
Trump’s favorite workout? Exercising his right to tweet.
Why does Trump carry a Sharpie? To make the facts fit his narrative.
Trump’s solution to global warming? Turn down the heat in the White House.
Why did Trump buy a ladder? To reach Trump jokes to share with friends new heights—of self-promotion.
What’s Trump’s secret to winning? Always moving the goalposts.
Trump doesn’t Trump humor for stand-up comedians lose weight—he Trump jokes from late-night shows just blames the scales.
Why does Trump avoid mirrors? He says they can’t handle his reflection.
Trump’s favorite meal? Ego on toast.
Why did Trump visit the moon? To claim it in the name of Trump Tower.
What’s Trump’s favorite art? Self-portraits.
Why did Trump hire a publicist? To keep his name “yuge” in the headlines.
Trump doesn’t wear a crown—he says it’s too subtle.
Why did Trump start a library? To house all his tweets.
What’s Trump’s favorite book? The one he’s in.
Why did Trump avoid the marathon? He says he’s already won the race.
Trump doesn’t need a throne—he’s already sitting on top of the world.
Why did Trump build a pool? To swim in his own success.
What’s Trump’s favorite flower? The sunflower—it always turns towards the sun.
Why did Trump bring a bullhorn to the rally? To make sure his words are heard “yuge.”
Trump doesn’t need applause—he gives himself a standing ovation.
Why did Trump avoid the museum? He said his legacy is still being written.
What’s Trump’s favorite quote? “I’m the best, believe me.”
Why does Trump love parades? He enjoys marching to his own drum.
Trump’s favorite weather? Anything that’s not a “stormy” Daniels.
Why did Trump bring a tape measure to the rally? To make sure the crowd was “yuge.”
Trump’s exercise routine? Tweeting at 3 a.m.
Why did Trump avoid the library? He said he knows all the best words already.
What’s Trump’s favorite dance? The Wall Tango—two steps forward, one step back.
Trump’s idea of a good night’s sleep? Dreaming of his reflection.
Why did Trump love the circus? He felt right at home with the elephants.
Trump doesn’t get sick—he just declares his germs fake news.
Why did Political humor Trump jokes collection Trump bring a lifeguard to the economy? To save it from drowning in debt.
What’s Trump’s favorite card game? Bridge—he loves building connections.
Trump’s golf score is classified—like his tax returns.